...+*My Monday*+...

It's been sometime I did not update my blog cause of some error when I try to log in my blogspot. Hmmm...many things happened recently. Well not happy things but I am trying to over come it. No worries. Btw, I got a job already~

Had worked for 9 days and things started to get nice and I am blending into the place. Need more time. Gonna get busy with my life. A new life and dump my old self away. Some people I also need to get rid of them from my life.

While yesterday, I went out with Michelle cause she tried her very very best to come here for me. I am glad to have her around cause there is still someone really will keep her promise for me. I am glad to have you around baby~

We went shopping together and I spend 1 night with her and her parents in the hotel. It was nice. And today at 1B, I bought TheFaceShop products man I just love it. The stuffs are so good to use plus the service are nice. It is better than the last one I went at Suria. Not only the products seem nothing special and the service was bad. Gonna despise that place for a moment.

Michelle~ I spend a night with her at Starbuck cause there is no more places to go and all closed

This is the stuffs I got and some are free samples~

Me Me Me~

My snack cause I am hungry and this is my leftover from many many days ago~ kinda burned it TvTlll

My new nail polish while watching "The Lost Bladesman"~

See See See~ But the taste is normal...nth special...and I even got myself sick feeling wanna puke after eating this flour thingy >x<

Sorry but I have sick tummy ache when I consume flour thingy like bread and biscuit. Well so much for my days but yeah, My new and 1st BB Cream~ gonna love it cause when I try on the sample, damn the cream is really so damn nice and it totally slowly blend into my skin and smooth.

There are still a few more stuffs I wanna buy there but too bad I am almost out of cash. Need to restrain myself from continue making my wallet bleed~ >x<

But yet I am happy with my new stuffs. For some reasons I am happy spending all this money I got with something I like~ haha

My Lovely Day~

Today was a boring day, like usual and was stuck in the house bored and grrrr....till Lisa suddenly says wanna go Tanjung Aru to watch sunset. Dang I just follow her since it's been a very long time since i go there. So here it is, enjoy my sunset view~

Me while Lisa is behind me ss'ing~ XD

I love this shot of her~

Here is my sandal~

Me and Lisa's hand~

Our dinner at BTC. Mine is Keuy Teow Goreng Tom Yam while Lisa's is Mamak Mee~ Yummy food and I wanna have them again~

This below photos are not from Tanjung Aru sorry~ >..<

This is my Bacon Cheese Burger from NY NY~ Yum but I don't like the mince meat...yuck~

Johnny's Garlic Cheese Bread~ Yummy~

This is promotion Starbuck I drink with Suyi at Centre Point and she treated me...Thank you Suyi~ I love my drink very very much~ XD

Somehow I started to miss my mum already.... =(

Just wish my plan in KK will hurry up pass pass away so I can go back to where my family belongs~ =)

My Lost Mind & My Mr. Right

There are times when people are lost. It's ok to be lost. I get lost so OFTEN till I lost count how many times I am lost in my life. I got lost in my life, relationships and my future. People around me doesn't notice. For each and everytime when I am on to something, things just doesn't get right. After for what I had plan for my life, things just doesn't go the way I wanted. I often cries out silently holding my pillow pushing hard unto my face to cover my voice so that no one can hears it. I doesn't want the world to know how weak and vulnerable I am.

Before something happened in my family, my sister asked me why I did not cry after for what happened. It's not that I don't cry, I can't cry out anymore. My feelings go numb already cause I suffer longer than them. I hid it longer than them cause I know what had happen but I just can't bring it up. My tears are dry.

And about my life, I can't give a damn about my past already even though I am regretting greatly now but what is done is done. I can't turn back the time unless God give me a 2nd chance to choose. By that time, I will choose wisely. I won't listen to anyone. Now I don't have more time since I am the eldest in the family. I do not have extra time to spend and I don't have extra money to start a new life. I still have 4 more young siblings. I already had my chance and I'd wasted it. So I can't do anything. All I can do now is start a new life and try all my best to make my life better.

Now I had lost my creativity and passion in my artwork. I can't do anything. I am lost with ways and emotions. I do not know what I want with my skill already. I can't draw. I can't hold my mechanical pencil very well already. I am so lost without my brain or creativity.

And for relationship matters, well of course I can't think about it right now. There will be no time for me to think about it. Eventhough there is someone occupied inside me but yet I know it is impossible right now. I have to say goodbye to him for the moment. Maybe need to be in a few years. I have to shut my door.

Today, there is this one question came up on my mind after I compare 2 guy friends I had with their personality and background. My question is :

Who will you choose :

Mr.A = have a promising future, boring and dull person, doesn't care much about you but himself, doesn't really need you unless he wanted to, can't always be there for you but yet he still loves you very very much.

Mr B = doesn't have a promising future but he loves you very very much and he can always be there for you, cares you a lot more, romantic and cheerful and playful and funny. He need you like just how much you need him. He can always be there for you.

Both also from the same background like middle class family.

So tell me, which will you choose. Money over Love? or Love over Money?

This question had been bothering me for few days till I ask some friends of mine. Then I finally know which I will choose.

I will choose Mr B. Because I know what kind of person I need in my life. Eventhough Mr B doesn't have a promising future but we both can make it happen till we have a promising future. At least with a person like MrB, my life will never be dull and fill with happiness. The future we both can work it out, but I can not stand to have someone who doesn't care for me at all eventhough he claim that he loves me.

I don't need your materials to be happy. I want you to be with me to be happy. I know nowadays the society had become so much materialistic but I still wanted to look for this person. I am still searching. And the one I store in my heart, I am still thinking which Mr he is.

Money can't buy Love~

I found this picture when I was reading one romance manga...I love this page very very much... I really wish that girl is me sleeping soundly with the one you loved so much~

My Decision to My Heart

I love him. Yes, I do love him. I tried to kill this feeling. I even tried few months not seeing him and it did went away but it came back again. I love him. But yet I cant. With my condition right now, everything is impossible.

The days I spent with him, is really good. It's beautiful, a dream. But after that, I will need to wake up. Wake up from my dream. Numb myself and get back to the society. Yes girl, you can do this. Strong girl. Be strong and stay happy.